Archive for July 11th, 2006

I know you’re all dying for my take on the latest Rasmussen poll that shows Tester leading Burns by seven points, so here it is!


It confirms the buzz in the air, that Montanans like Tester. It also confirms my earlier suspicions that the first poll after the primary would show Tester ahead and with a larger lead than in the May poll.

Singer over at LiTW claims that this polls shows Burns’ campaign strategy is not working. After all, the junior Senator has been flooding the market with flag-burning and gay-hater propaganda, but Tester’s lead grew three percent. A three-percent jump is not insignificant, folks, especially when Tester’s general election hasn’t really gotten underway.

Heck, maybe all of Burns’ advertising actually helps Tester! Maybe the more Montanans see of Burns, the less they like! I know that’s true with me. Every time I see an ad featuring that smug Missouri liar, I want to retch. Maybe Tester should just sit this one out and let Burns beat himself.

That is, of course, a joke. Tester will do a fine job of being himself. And win this race.

By the way, Klein has written another column about Tester in Time: “Flat on Top, Fiery Inside.” I ponied up the two bucks to read it so you don’t have to. Basically it’s a rehashed and watered-down version of his online column. (Apparently people who still read on paper are stupid. Or, at least, Time’s editors think so.) The latest isn’t worth even highlighting here…

Update: Just saw a cool letter in Sunday’s Missoulian on Burns’ infamous anti-buzz cut ad, thought it could use reproducing here in this this post. Why not? Anyhoo, take it away, Dustin Hankinson of Missoula!

Republican ad offensive to Montanans

The Senate race in Montana is getting a lot of attention primarily because it is a coveted Republican seat that’s worth fighting over. Beyond the purely political aspects, this race should be vital to us as Montanans because these senators represent us at many tables where policy decisions are made. They are an extension of us as citizens. That’s why this race should matter. It is also the reason that I’m offended.

I’m offended by a political ad brought to us by National Republican Senatorial Committee showing an actor portraying Jon Tester’s barber. Basically the ad had no substance and was nothing more than an excuse to splatter the word “liberal” all over the screen. Why am I offended? This bothers me because it degrades Montanans. The actor uses some hillbilly twang which must be a stereotype of people who live in a rural state. More than that, this committee thinks that we Montanans will see “liberal” and suddenly all of Sen. Burns’ sins will be forgiven and forgotten. It’s like the political elite in D.C. think we’re such simple people that we’ll accept this misdirection away from Burns’ problems and be mesmerized by name-calling.

I think Montana deserves better. I also think that these kind of drive-by ads show desperation and weakness. If all Burns will do is toss labels around to see what sticks, I look forward to being represented by Sen. Tester.

So around the 4th of July, there was some noise about Billings’ fireworks ban, mostly from Montana blogger Justin who, besides writing a kick-*ss and entertaining blog, got pretty heated up about the propensity of government to take away rights because of a little inconvenience and a few idiots who mess things up for everybody.

It’s not the best written argument for freedom you’ll read, but it might be the most passionate. It also makes a lot of d*mn sense.

So what the h*ll, I thought, change a few words here and change a few words there, suddenly you have a passionate defense of another issue that’s been pretty topical lately: gay marriage.

So that’s what I did.

First, let me say I don’t know if Justin supports gay marriage is against it or, as he might say, if he just doesn’t give a f*ck. And I don’t give a d*mn if it bothers him I’m stealing his very words to defend gays. It’s my idea, not Justin’s, and I take full responsibility for the content on this site. There. That’s my disclaimer.

So…the rest of this post is stolen verbatim from Justin. (Thanks, Justin!) Except the stuff in brackets, which is mine. And, oh yeah, I toned down the language a tad so the d*mn work filters won’t ban my g*dd*mned site.

This attitude is the reason why our country is headed directly into the proverbial toilet. “I don’t like it so nobody should be allowed to do it, I’m special and I’m all that matters, everyone else should bow down and kiss my ass, my [religion] is more important than your freedom.” Poppycock.

In response to all of these people that I’m sure will fire back at me here…with a whole sh*tload of statistics and horror stories and whatever other reasons they can muster to justify their own positions in direct opposition to freedom whether it involves [gay marriage] or seatbelts or cigarettes or helmets or open containers of alcoholic beverages, I’d like to ask you this.

When was the last time that your, that’s your own, not your cousin in Cincinnati, not somebody that you saw on Oprah, not your cousin’s stepsister’s uncle’s former roommate’s, but your very own [marriage was destroyed] because of somebody horsing around with [gay marriage]? If there’s one person out there that can name a date I’ll be really surprised. Even so, there’s a lot of people out there total so I still wouldn’t consider that good enough odds to suppress the freedom of a single American citizen in any way, shape, or form. As a very wise man once said, “Sh*t Happens”. If I were to ever see [dozens of marriages on the rocks the day after the legalizing of gay marriage], perhaps then I would consider this [gay marriage ban] to be a just and forthright law. Until then I’ll consider it nothing but the extremely loud whining of a handful of babies that managed to get their way simply because the [Republican party spied a potential source of votes].

I’m sure lots of [gay relationships] get [ruined] by careless morons…every year, but I’m the type that’s more inclined to ask “How many [gay relationships worked] last year?” If an honest study were done I’m sure it would find for a resounding majority on the side of safety and responsibility, as would be the case with most all of the once common things that the [gay- and sex-hating] crowd have succeeded in outlawing.

With that I’d like to announce the beginning of [4&20 blackbird’s] official campaign to ban the eating of [ham] on [Easter]. I f*cking hate [ham] so I don’t think you people should be allowed to eat it and I’m important d*mn it. Don’t say that it’s different because your eating of [ham] doesn’t hurt me, oh no, you’re not going to get away with that lame *ssed excuse buddy. For the next week after your little [pig] slaughtering festival every place I walk into is trying to pawn off a [ham] sandwich on me. You b*stards don’t even eat these once majestic [mammals], in your insatiable thirst for bloody [pork] you just kill kill kill, then roast their eviscerated carcasses and leave them in the fridge to rot except for what sandwich meat you can pawn off on unwary visitors. I see right through your bloodthirsty annual death fest, and I’m going to put a stop to it. LONG LIVE THE [PIGS]!

As a side note I’m going to branch out and ban the cutting of Christmas trees because it’s a horrible waste of a natural resource, that and it disturbs my goldfish, I don’t know why it just does, he’s sensitive. Poor little fellow goes belly up instantly the second he hears a chainsaw. Last year I had to spend a fortune on life support at the vet’s office just to keep him alive until it stopped. I’d also like to ban the wearing of green on St. Patrick’s day, just because I’m an *sshole and I can’t stand to see other people having fun, even if they are Irish.

Sound ridiculous? G*dd*mn right it does, now go check yourselves before we’re all required to put on a helmet and a padded suit within five minutes of getting out of bed, bunch of self righteous crybaby f*ckers, grow some stones and deal with it. Just because you don’t like something doesn’t make it wrong, and it’d be a cold day in h*ll when I’d use my [religion] as an excuse to cramp someone else’s style.

Now I’m sure I’ve once again placed myself directly in front of a virtual firing squad of name calling and statistic spouting and blah blah blah. Go ahead, let me have it, just keep in mind that I really don’t give a sh*t if your cousin Elmo doesn’t have any [children] because he [met a guy at the local gay bar] and [moved in with him to a walkup in San Francisco] and now the poor bastard [doesn’t have a wife or two-car garage], nor do I care if your poor [Uncle Johnny] p*sses himself whenever he so much as [sees a picture of Brad Pitt].

When I was a kid I had a [friend who turned out gay], guess what, he lived to a ripe old age and an astounding majority of his life was devoid of [wild, HIV-related sex] and therefore all and all he was a very happy little [guy]. I loved that [friend], but I [got married anyway], that and I really like [f*cking women]. He may not have liked it, but he survived and your [gay friend/relative/co-worker] will too. If you’d p*ss away the efforts of people like [Martin Luther King Jr] because your [marriage sucks], then so be it. Just don’t expect me to join you, and don’t let me hear you b*tching when something that you believe in gets outlawed because some other whiney b*stard doesn’t like it. Over the top? You g*dd*mned right, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.


Huge news! Tester extends his lead in the latest poll, 50-43 percent! More later…but considering Tester has yet to really start campaigning, Burns is in big trouble.

The latest Montana-related GOP gaffes: the ‘pubs confuse Butte with Vermont; the national branch tacitly admits Burns is as dirty as yesterday’s underpants and Klindt spins it with postmodern flair; and Burns was for drilling the Rocky Mountain Front before he was against it.

Motto’s all over the shady groups investing in the terrible trio of right-wing state ballot initiatives. More on this later, too.

TPM Cafe on the Governor’s recent political maneuvering.

John at Blogenlust has a possible explanation on why Zidane head butted the Italian. Comes with video of the Italian’s history of cheap shots. A real winner, this guy.

Orrin Hatch pulls strings to get a music producer out of a Dubai jail. Funny thing is that the producer’s lawyer also got Hatch a $39K music deal…

John Dean on conservatives: they “need an authoritarian figure to guide them and they willingly do whatever it takes to please that figure…”

Bush’s top ten signing statements. Read ‘em and weep.

Surprise! There have been cover-ups of recent US military atrocities in Iraq! Apparently, though, this has been going on for awhile…

Bush diplomacy at work: a Middle Eastern “ally” acquits al Qaeda suspects who had admitted fighting US troops in Iraq. Hey, but we got the Miami 7!

Another theory on why Bush is a bad President. Interesting, isn’t it? The debate is not on whether he stinks, but why.

Conservatives at work on the floor of the Senate: trying to insert fraudulent amicus brief into the Senate record in an attempt to influence the SCOTUS Hamdan decision. Um, that’s illegal.

British under siege by the Taliban in Afghanistan.

A d*mn good reason to kick Lieberman out of the Senate.

The early comments by AT&T’s Ed Whitacre that spurred the push for Net Neutrality. We don’t know what the telecoms will do if Net Neutrality is defeated, huh?

Roger Lowenstein’s excellent examination of the economics of illegal immigration.

Hilarious German satire: the Bush Pilot.

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