And now for something completely different

by Pete Talbot

(The Montana lefty blogosphere has been cranking out some great stuff, IMHO, on state and national budgets, and on eminent domain; and offering up some honest critiques of Montana Legislators and U.S. Senators and Congressmen on both sides of the aisle, to name but a few of the worthy posts of late.  And for the most part, the comments have been lively, thoughtful and informative.  But I need a break.  Hope you do, too.)

I’d opt for a colonoscopy rather than go to the Wal-Mart Superstore at the corner of Mullan and Reserve Streets.  So you know it was extremely important to me; the ‘it’ being the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile.

When I was a little kid in Madison, Wisc., home of Oscar Mayer, the Wienermobile was present at every major event.  There was a little person dressed as a chef who would hand out hot dogs and wiener whistles.  Those days are gone but new, scaled-down versions of the Wienermobile are criss-crossing the land.

The Wienermobile was in Missoula this past weekend.  I know you’re dying for the stats.  It’s a converted GM W4 series chassis with a fiberglass body and a four-speed automatic;  six litre, 350 Vortec 5700 V-8 engine;  60 mph in 24.81 sec.; miles per gallon are 18 downhill, five uphill.

Since I haven’t been offered an ambassadorship to Fiji or a slot on the Olympic table tennis team, I’d gladly take a Wienermobile driving job, except for the hanging out in Wal-Mart parking lots.

During these times of war, pestilence, retrogression and downright meanness, a diversion like the Wienermobile is just what I needed.


  1. ayn rand

    are you saying you are a weiner or a wiener?

  2. Geoff Badenoch

    I remember when I was a kid,the Wienermobile appeared at the World’s Fair and I got a wienerwhistle. There is something perverse about the attraction of something like this that is rooted in our youth, but I totally get it. In another example of agreement, I think the colonoscopy is the right choice.

  3. petetalbot

    I’ll send you an email Lacy. And good luck.

  4. Ingemar Johansson

    They still sell Oscar dogs @ Wally World, don’t they?

    Thought you WM bashers would enjoy this.

  5. Good to know that one of the Oscar Mayer heirs, Chuck Collins, is a strong advocate for raising taxes on the wealthy. Is the Wienermobile coming East? Haven’t seen it since I was a kitten.

  6. I feel like the fire ant at the picnic…but I want to point out that O.M. wieners are factory farmed and their main ingredient is suffering. Of course, the Wienermobile is brilliant marketing that distracts us from that detail with buns and whistles, and the proof is, here we baby boomers are, waxing sentimental about it. I’m pretty sure I had a wiener whistle, too, way back when.

    Depending on which variety of wieners you buy, check the label–some are made with mechanically separated meat. Tasty!

    Eric Schlosser (Fast Food Nation):
    “Tyson ads don’t show chickens crammed together at the company’s factory farms, and Oscar Mayer ads don’t reveal what really goes into those wieners. There’s a good reason for this. Once you learn how our modern industrial food system has transformed what most Americans eat, you become highly motivated to eat something else…

    • petetalbot

      I’m not endorsing factory farming, just the Wienermobile (a trip down memory lane for me).

      Your points are well taken, Kathleen.

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