Things One Learns While Traveling
Traveling with kids can be stressful, especially in this day and age. But I learned some important things on my trip back to the midwest to visit family and friends that I would like to share.
1. Window shades CANNOT be closed during take-off and landing. I asked the stewardass why, and she said “in case of emergency” like that’s all she had to say to justify this new, idiotic rule. So when my 3 year old son asked me why he couldn’t put the shade down to shield his eyes from the blazing sun, I told him sometimes there were stupid rules that adults made up for no good reason, and we just had to deal with it.
2. Kids under the age of 12 do not need to take off their shoes in the security line, and if you’re 3 year old is acting slightly terrified at all the stern looking people keeping us safe from the terrorists, then you ARE allowed to walk through the metal detector holding him. I hope the terrorists don’t exploit this weakspot in the TSA.
3. There is simply no escaping the stupid ideology of crusading Christians, because when you least expect it, you may find yourself involved in a political conversation with Laurie Roth, one of the candidates seeking the nomination for the Constitution Party’s loony bid for the presidency.
Unfortunately I’m being completely serious. While trying to quell multiple tantrums, I had Laurie Roth—self-described “Annie Oakley of the airwaves”—trying to engage both myself and the pregnant women sitting in the window seat in political conversations. It wasn’t until the end of the flight that she clued me in to her destination (Nashville) and her reason for traveling (to become the Constitution Party’s nominee for president).
Want to know more about Laurie? Here is some info from her bio:
Laurie is happily married and currently resides in Washington State where she spends her free time walking her two dogs and feeding deer, raccoons, birds, flying squirrels, and anything or anyone else who might show up at her door. She really is incorrigible!
Laurie Roth has a Ph.D. in counseling and a black belt in Tae Kwon Do. If she can’t reason with you, you had better duck before the roundhouse kick sends you flying! She is the proverbial “pastor’s daughter” when it comes to her sense of adventure and her independent thinking. However, underneath her sharp wit, loony antics, and twisted views, you will find a woman with an uncommon gentle nature, a daily walk with God, and a unique talent for finding success against all odds.
One of the words that pops into my head when I think about crusading Christians is contradiction. You know, like claiming to have a “gentle nature” right after threatening to violently dispense with people who can’t be reasoned with.
A quick perusal of her website revealed more contradictions, as delightfully exemplified by the title of this post: There IS no freedom for America without faith in God. Like my 3 year old says, wowsers!
Here’s a little taste of Laurie’s predictable rant:
It is no mystery that America was founded by courageous and committed Christians who treasured freedom and were willing to fight for it. Our whole foundation legally and culturally was built on Judeo/Christian values and beliefs. This is the true backbone of our history even though many try and invent new history out of the blue.Of course our founders and framers were far from perfect. Some were slave owners and others were moral posers. However, most were guided by faith in God, honor and the desire to protect freedom. Eventually, most of our early leaders did the right thing regarding slaves. Even George Washington finally released his slaves and gave them all land.
God blessed our nation as we drew into Him and sought His guidance. We came out on the right side of slavery. We confronted it and crushed it. Women battled for the right to vote and won, while civil rights grew for all. America has never been perfect. Our people have struggled with the temptation to lust, power and greed just like any other people in the world. However, it is most clear we aren’t every other country. Why did we explode to the number one super power on earth? I’ll tell you why. Because we are the most inventive, gutsy, creative, entrepreneurial, compassionate, determined and Christian people on earth. God has authored the very formation of our country and purpose in the world, while blessing us with enormous wealth and achievement.
As America has bit into the apple of rebellion, self worship — too busy for God, we have seen God give us what we have asked for more and more. We have become more and more seduced and tricked by evil, thus the famous election of 2008 when we elected a wanna be dictator, Barack Hussein Obama. Evil in most cases first comes as everything good – change, generosity, help, diversion and gifts.
The ‘diversion’ part of evil has been in our face from the beginning of the Obama machine roll out. The ‘seduction’ shoe has dropped. Now, the ‘oppression and control’ shoe is dropping all around us and people are waking up….although, a bit late but not too late. Half the states have stood against the Health care bill and now the Supreme Court (which Obama taunts) will render a decision.
Obama has signed the NDAA bill into law, another oppressive control coming down. He has signed himself more Marshall law power, approved drones flying overhead, and is systematically destroying our Coal industry and other energy. The Constitution and Congress defying list of controls go on and on. Obama should have been impeached several years ago! Where has Congress been but seduced and quieted in the Obama glue they have been stuck on stupid in?
First, it’s “martial” law (a PHD, really?)
Second, this apple eating imagery is ridiculous. Laurie claims “self-worship” is the evil sin undermining America, but that comes after she expresses the most delusional strain of American exceptionalism that exists—the vile theocratic strain.
Luckily, crusading Christians have never been bothered by contradictions, because they have things like “belief” and “faith” and other excuses for being dangerous zealots trying to impose their theocracy on the rest of us.
That said, my chat with Laurie wasn’t all that bad. She listened to me advocate for a single payer health care solution, and I listened to her state very clearly that no one was going to put a computer chip into her body.
Yes, Dr. Roth and the political party she is yearning to be the nominee of is fringe, but then again, so am I, so I should probably mention that during our brief conversation 30,000 feet in the air, there were a few agreements, like the National Defense Authorization Act being terrible legislation further eroding our constitutionally protected rights, and agreement that the War Powers Act should apply to all of America’s military incursions into sovereign nations, like Libya.
That said, if I’m going to throw away my vote on a third party, it will more than likely be the Green Party.
It would have been interesting to hear what Laurie thought about the war on women currently being waged by the GOP, but our conversation was cut short when my oldest kicked his little brother into the seat in front of him for daring to place a hand on the coveted iPhone.
Another thing I learned on that flight: 6am is too early to purchase whiskey. Damn.