Liz’s Weekly Poetry Series: Clinton Group Philosophy Statement

by lizard

Brian Schweitzer won a seat on the board of the Stillwater Mining Co. I certainly don’t have any special insight into what that means for Montana’s open senate seat, but that of course won’t stop me from speculating.

Brian’s stance on “clean” coal, Keystone, and guns has already received some scrutiny from the left, as evidenced by a Daily Kos piece titled Brian Schweitzer: bold progressive or just another fossil fueled politician?

It would be a mistake to define Schweitzer’s populism as progressive. It would also be a mistake to expect a popular Montana governor to be everything a lefty like myself would want.

Instead of getting into all the pros and cons of a Schweitzer run for senate right now, I thought I would take a different approach.

Language fascinates me, and this week’s poem is a found poem featuring language taken straight from the Clinton Group’s philosophy statement. This group is a New York based, globally diversified hedge fund that, along with Brian, spearheaded the attempted takeover of the Stillwater Mining Co.

Enjoy!

*

PHILOSOPHY STATEMENT

Through our fundamental research
trading and risk management
we
recognize and dynamically allocate capital
to attractive
opportunities.

Our expertise
across the capital structure, markets and globe
provide us with
a unique macro vantage point.

Our deep re-
search and op-
portunistic trading
help to ensure we
optimize our portfolios

while limiting risk.

Our quantitative equity strategy
combines behavioral
and other market inefficiencies
in an unbiased, multifactor approach.

The system,
which was developed in-house,
is based on ten years of actual, time-tested trading.

It uses leading research
on statistical arbitrage and adaptive systems
that recognize repetitive market behavior and patterns.

This data-intensive investment approach
seeks to successfully identify
and combine the hidden factors
that drive the returns
of individual securities and market segments.

—Clinton Group


  1. Pogo Possum

    “Paradise”
    When I was a child my family made a living
    in the Beartooth Mountains working the Stillwater Mine.
    They were prosperous days that are fondly remembered
    Good pay and good people not forgotten in time.

    And daddy, won’t you take me back to Stillwater County
    Down by the Boulder River where Paradise lay?
    Well, I’m sorry, my son, but you’re too late in asking
    Brian Schweitzer’s Eastern Hedge Fund hauled the jobs all away.

    The Montana Unions all stood with the miners
    Told the greedy Eastern scoundrels to just go away
    But Brian and Jag joined up with the Hedge Funds
    To carve up Montana for their big fat pay day.

    And daddy, won’t you take me back to Stillwater County
    Down by the Boulder River where Paradise lay?
    Well, I’m sorry, my son, but you’re too late in asking
    Brian Schweitzer’s Eastern Hedge Fund hauled the jobs all away.

    Then the big Eastern Hedge Funds brought in their accountants
    To sell off the assets which was always their plan.
    Then, they turned on the workers and Montana was forsaken
    Then they wrote it all down as the progress of man.

    And daddy, won’t you take me back to Stillwater County
    Down by the Boulder River where Paradise lay?
    Well, I’m sorry, my son, but you’re too late in asking
    Brian Schweitzer’s Eastern Hedge Fund hauled the jobs all away.

    When I die, let my ashes float down the Boulder River
    Let my soul roll up on the Yellowstone’s swell.
    I’ll be halfway to Heaven with Paradise waitin’
    Brian Schweitzer and his Hedge Fund can go straight to Hell.

    And daddy, won’t you take me back to Stillwater County
    Down by the Boulder River where Paradise lay?
    Well, I’m sorry, my son, but you’re too late in asking
    Brian Schweitzer’s Eastern Hedge Fund hauled the jobs all away.

    Sung to the tune of “Paradise” by John Prine

  2. I still can’t imagine Brian in the Senate. It would drive him crazy to sit in endless meetings and go to endless fundraisers. And a junior Senator with all those average to low IQ types running around Capital Hill with no ability to think outside the box? I can’t see it. He likes to run things. He’s not easy to peg, but I’d say he is a Teddy Roosevelt Republican/Independent. Teddy is a favorite of his as is Burton Wheeler. Teddy was far to the left of present day Democrats; breaking up the monopolies and at the same time creating something new; national parks. Brian is also a single payer advocate. So, despite the coal deal, I hope he runs for president. I try not to pay attention to national elections anymore, but It would make the election a lot more fun if he were in it. Shake things up.

  1. 1 152 Poetry Posts to Celebrate April, National Poetry Month | 4&20 blackbirds

    […] Clinton Group Philosophy Statement […]




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