America’s Football Tradition is Under Attack!

by lizard

America continues to face a dangerous internal threat, and some events over the weekend have shown America’s culture warriors that there is a great need to remain vigilant against…marijuana.

It’s bad enough that America’s most celebrated sporting event—the Super Bowl—will be mocked for the next two weeks as the Ganja Bowl because both teams come from the only two states to legalize recreational use of marijuana. We all know football is the undisputed territory of excessive alcohol consumption, a tradition that is under attack by buzzkill activists who actually advocate ending alcohol advertisements. Can you imagine Super Bowl Sunday without the family-friendly marketing campaign of Budweiser?

Well, now that America’s football tradition is at risk, enter our socialist stoner president, Barak Obama. In an unbelievably reckless move that will push our youth into the den of iniquity, the president has made a wild claim that Marijuana is no worse than alcohol:

President Barack Obama said in an interview published Sunday that he believes smoking marijuana is no more dangerous than drinking alcohol. And he suggested it’s even less dangerous “in terms of its impact on the individual consumer.”

It’s clear what’s going on here. Alcohol represents capitalism—units of consumption (bottles, cans, etc.) intended for individual consumers. Marijuana represents communism—units of consumption (joints, glass bowls, etc.) intended for groups of consumers to pass around, collectively sharing the intoxicating effect of a substance that simply grows from the ground.

The only way to save America now is to impeach the president for essentially hand-rolling joints and delivering them to our nation’s youth, then, in two weeks, get annihilated on booze. Vomiting seven-layer dip into your toilet before the sun goes down is not just fun, but your patriotic duty as Americans. I hope people in Montana are ready to do their duty in two weeks.

  1. Big Swede

    Actually beer is a “collectivist” product. It’s taxed on its manufacturing facilities, delivery vehicles, offices. The beer industry employes over a million, each paying state and local income taxes and FICA. The states demand excise taxes as high as 66 cents a six pack and most states charge sales taxes at the register.

    Pot on the other hand with few exceptions is grown without these “contributions”.

    • Big Swede

      And therein lies the rub. In the exchange of money between dealer and druggie how much goes to the village?

      How much for homeless shelters? How much for Medicaid, welfare, WICA, and rent assistance?

      • JC

        Doesn’t the dealer spend the money on yachts, lear jets and third homes in tropical paradises? I thought you guys were all about trickle down… Didn’t know you were concerned about the social safety net.

        • Big Swede

          Up in these hills we care for ourselves.

          I do find it ironic that you, thru others, demand so much from legitimate business and none from the GD pusher man.

          • JC

            You have no idea what i demand from “the GD pusher man.” So don’t go there.

            As for the legalized pushers — the pharmaceutical industry and their prescription writing middle-men — I demand a lot. Like accountability for unprecedented levels of prescription drug-related addiction, death and other social costs from “side effects.”

            You know, some sense of responsibility for the “collateral damage” from designer pain meds and mood changers.

    • Steve W

      I find government beer far cheaper and higher quality than mob beer. Home brew is best, though. And it’s the freshest.

      Medical cannabis growers in all legal states pay taxes on profits and or sales taxes where applicable. In CO and WA they will be paying taxes. They’d be crazy not to.

  2. steve kelly

    Which village, Swede? CIA, DEA, Customs, ICE, DOJ, DOD, DARE and every county sheriff in the U.S., etc. are the “villages” benefitting directly from the arbitrary legal status of non-alcoholic drugs. Jail time for marijuana was the historical tipping point, crack sentencing and 3-strikes followed. Pot prisoners “contribute” plenty — far, far more than criminal lobbyists, politicians and bank executives in my opinion.

    Bypassing the IRS and state revenue department is specifically designed to support more autonomous police powers, fewer social safety-net programs, and little, if any, judicial and fiscal review by elected officials.

  3. The president has just helped those states thinking of legalization – helped them big time!

    This could be another point in stump speeches on this issue. If we can just get some major bags to start lending to marijuana businesses it’ll be really close.

    I still think a marijuana tax trust fund for MT is a great idea and one that could pay for social programs and sporadic property tax rebates.

    Everyone can win with this issue – including parents; it’ll give them a much-needed chance to talk with their kids about, well…anything!

    And shouldn’t parents be educating their kids about drugs? It’s much cheaper and more effective than the state doing it.

    Think of the money we can use from marijuana tax revenue to pay for our aging seniors. Where is all this money for our aging population going to come from?

    Assisted and live-in home care is quite expensive as many Montana seniors are finding out. Sure, medicaid can fund much of this, but we all know the financial house of cards that is the federal government.

    Marijuana taxes will give states and the nation a much needed source of revenue that legislators can argue how to spend for years to come.

    Thank you President Obama for your comments this Sunday!

  4. steve kelly


    When you’re doing 5-10 in the federal pen, and the DEA just seized and auctioned off all your property, legalizaiton and an excise tax might seem like a pretty fair exchange. I’m happy to stipulate to the fact that nobody likes taxes. Just trying to bring a little perspective.

  5. Abe Froman

    At some point in the near future the “legitimate” marketing & commercial potential of weed will equal or surpass that of alcohol. There will be the super bowl ads with the weed equivalent of the Budweiser frogs & spuds Mackenzie. Just the term Super “Bowl” alone is a great set up right there.

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